I wanted to point this article out because I felt (in many
ways) it pertains to our intimate relationship as married couples in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.
Often I receive questions about what is or is not
appropriate sexually in marriage, as well as what kind of language is
appropriate to use in our sacred sexually-intimate interactions with our
spouses.
Something that stood out to me in what Elder Brewerton said was
“Profane words never edify.”
The same could be said for profane erotic material
and sexual activities that defile the sacred with our spouses.
To more fully understand, it helps to look at the word “edify”.
To edify means to build. It means to
strengthen someone’s moral, religious and intellectual character. [i]
Words (whatever they may be) can have different meanings in
different cultures, ethnicities, nationalities, and even within our immediate
families. With the exception of the irreverent use of the name of Deity, to say “this word is
bad in every circumstance and for everyone” is not realistic.
Some terms (even those considered profane) may be appropriate if used in their correct context and can be very appropriate when attempting to communicate what action one spouse is wanting the other spouse to do in their sacred intimate activities - but would be totally inappropriate to use outside of that context or that sacred private space. In all cases, it should be agreed upon by both spouses the use of that term and when it would be appropriate to use it and to let the Holy Spirit guide.
Some terms (even those considered profane) may be appropriate if used in their correct context and can be very appropriate when attempting to communicate what action one spouse is wanting the other spouse to do in their sacred intimate activities - but would be totally inappropriate to use outside of that context or that sacred private space. In all cases, it should be agreed upon by both spouses the use of that term and when it would be appropriate to use it and to let the Holy Spirit guide.
What we’ve found ourselves asking as a married couple is...
“Is
the use of this word, or is this activity, edifying our marriage or profaning and weakening it?”
This question can be an effective filter for those things that may harm our eternal relationship. (see also my article:
“Don’t Erotic Words Offend The Spirit?” [ii])
As you contemplate this as a couple, I hope you will also consider what Elder Ted E Brewerton says in this talk "Profanity and Swearing"
