Happy
Continue-The-Courtship Night!
If
you find yourselves stuck at home together, for whatever reason, don’t default
to watching movies on the couch. Again.
This
little treasure is from John Gottman, and you can use it to get to know each
other better. It’s called the…
Love
Map 20 Question Game
Play this game together
in the spirit of laughter and gentle fun. The more you play, the more you’ll learn about the love
maps concept and how to apply it to your own relationship.
Each of you should take
a piece of paper and pen. Together, randomly decide on twenty numbers between 1 and 60. Write
the numbers down in a column on the left-hand side of your paper.
Below is a list of
numbered questions. Beginning with the top of your column, match the numbers you chose with the
corresponding questions. Each of you should ask your partner this question.
If your partner answers
correctly (you be the judge), he or she receives the number of points indicated
for that question, and you receive one point.
If your partner answers
incorrectly, neither of you receive any points. The same rules apply when you
answer.
The winner is the
person with the higher score after you’ve both answered all twenty questions.
1. Name
my two closest friends. (2)
2. What
is my favorite musical group, composer, or instrument? (2)
3. What
was I wearing when we first met? (2)
4. Name
one of my hobbies. (3)
5. Where
was I born? (1)
6. What
stresses am I facing right now? (4)
7. Describe
in detail what I did today, or yesterday. (4)
8. When
is my birthday? (1)
9. What
is the date of our anniversary (or engagement)? (1)
10. Who
is my favorite relative? (2)
11. What
is my fondest unrealized dream? (5)
12. What
is my favorite flower? (2)
13. What
is one of my greatest fears or disaster scenarios? (3)
14. What
is my favorite time of day? (3)
15. What
makes me feel most complete? (4)
16. What
turns me on? (3)
17. What
is my favorite meal? (2)
18. What
is my favorite was to spend the evening? (2)
19. What
is my favorite color? (1)
20. What
personal improvements do I want to make in my life? (4)
21. What
kind of present would I like best? (2)
22. What
was one of my best childhood experiences? (2)
23. What
was my favorite vacation? (2)
24. What
is one of my favorite ways to be soothed? (4)
25. Who
is my greatest source of support (other than you)? (3)
26. What
is my favorite sport? (2)
27. What
do I most like to do with time off? (2)
28. What
is one of my favorite weekend activities? (2)
29. What
is my favorite getaway place? (3)
30. What
is my favorite movie? (2)
31. What
are some of the important events coming up in my life? How do I feel about
them? (4)
32. What
are some of my favorite ways to work out? (2)
33. Who
was my best friend in childhood? (3)
34. What
is one of my favorite magazines? (2)
35. Name
one of my major rivals or “enemies”. (3)
36. What
would I consider my dream job? (4)
37. What
do I fear the most? (4)
38. Who
is my least favorite relative? (3)
39. What
is my favorite holiday? (2)
40. What
kinds of books do I most like to read? (3)
41. What
is my favorite TV show? (2)
42. Am
I right handed or left-handed? (2)
43. What
am I most sad about? (4)
44. Name
one of my concerns or worries. (4)
45. What
medical problems do I worry about? (2)
46. What
was my most embarrassing moment? (3)
47. What
was my worst childhood experience? (3)
48. Name
two of the people I admire most (4)
49. Name
my major rival or enemy. (3)
50. Of
all the people we both know, who do I like the least? (3)
51. What
is one of my favorite deserts? (2)
52. What
is my social security number? (2)
53. Name
one of my favorite novels? (2)
54. What
is my favorite restaurant? (2)
55. What
are two of my aspirations, hopes, wishes? (4)
56. Do
I have a secret ambition? What is it? (4)
57. What
foods do I hate? (2)
58. What
is my favorite animal? (2)
59. What
is my favorite song? (2)
60. Which
sports team is my favorite? (2)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gottman,
John and Nan Silver: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical
Guide From the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert
(New
York: Three Rivers Press, 1999)
