How can a loss of the
Spirit disrupt the formula for the best possible sex?
Sister Wendy Watson Nelson, in her talk Love and Marriage[i] , shared
this insight about the role the Spirit plays in marital sex:
“Marital intimacy is
ordained by God. It is commanded and commended by Him, because it draws a
husband and wife closer together AND closer to the Lord.
True marital intimacy
involves the whole soul of each spouse. It is the uniting of the body AND the
spirit of the husband with the body AND the spirit of his wife.
Just imagine…He can
purify your feelings! Therefore, ANYTHING that invites the Spirit into your
life and into the life of your spouse and your marriage will increase your
ability to experience marital intimacy. It really is as simple, and as
profound, as that.
On the other hand, anything that offends the Spirit will
decrease your ability to be one with your spouse. Things such as anger, lust,
unforgiveness, contention, immorality and unrepented sin will reduce your
attempt for marital intimacy to be something that’s nothing more than a sexual
experience.
While worldly sex is
under the influence of the world and the Adversary, and involves carnal,
sensual, and devilish passions, God ordained marital intimacy as under the
influence of the Spirit and involves Spirit-enhanced and purified passions.
The truth is, the more
pure you are, the more marvelous your marital intimacy will be.
With worldly sex,
anything goes. With marital intimacy, exquisite care is taken to avoid anything
and everything, from language to music to movies, that offends the Spirit, your
spirit, or your spouse’s.
While worldly sex is
lustful, and kills love, marital intimacy generates more love.
Worldly sex degrades
men and women, and their bodies, degrades the body as a plaything, while
marital intimacy honors men and women, and celebrates the body as one of the
great prizes of mortal life.
With worldly sex,
individuals can feel used, abused, and ultimately, more lonely. With marital
intimacy, spouses feel more united, loved, nurtured, and understood.
Worldly sex ravages
and eventually ruins relationships. Marital intimacy strengthens marriages. It
supports, heals, and hallows the lives of spouses and their marriage.
Worldly sex has been
likened to the toot of a flute, while marital intimacy has been likened to the
grandeur of an entire orchestra.”
Repent…for the best
possible sex…?
The best
possible sex is not just intercourse.
It includes
sex, but it’s not just sex.
It’s all the
functional forms of love, operating together as part of that full symphony of
intimacy. Marital intimacy is the coming together of a man and woman, sexually,
physically, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. Two people united in
purpose and heart and mind and spirit.
We can
literally be sanctified and worthier to have the Holy Ghost with us by having sex with our spouse – if we do it the right way.
World Cannot Teach Sexuality with the
Spirit
This turns
the world’s reasoning on its head, where the worldly peak of experience
involves having the best, most involved, ‘non-vanilla’ physical experience
possible.
The secular
world doesn’t consider the spiritual aspect of our lives at all. They do try to
use the physical to access the spiritual, but to them, it’s in a temporal
perspective – using the tantric energy flows in the body, which is still using
the body. The Holy Spirit cannot be accessed that way. Using chemical means or
harder, more physically punishing experiences to help drown out the pain of
life is not the same thing as accessing the Spirit.
But this is
what the gospel promises (and delivers on)[ii].
Those who trade this promise away for mere physical experience in the wrong
context are getting only a fraction of what’s available to mortals sexually.
Those who
focus strictly on the physical in marriage, or seek worldly sources for
learning without incorporating spiritual improvement, often find themselves
equally frustrated, and are unable to truly find the sweet, liberating peace
that comes from the Holy Ghost.
No Shortcuts
A loss of the
Spirit shuts us out from having the best possible sex. Only repentance, humility
and obedience will open that door and keep it open. There’s no cheating the
Holy Ghost. We either do what is required of it or we don’t get to have the “full
orchestra” promised from having it with us in our married sexual relationship.[iii]
**
Join us next time as we discuss how not scheduling time for marital intimacy affects the formula for
the best possible sex.
[i] Watson
Nelson, Wendy. Love and Marriage. From a young adult devotional given in
January 2017. https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/broadcasts/article/worldwide-devotionals/2017/01/love-and-marriage?lang=eng
[ii] John
14:26-27 – No one but the Savior controls who gets the Holy Ghost and how they
get it. No one can legislate that, no one can create laws to change how we
access it, or cheat or protest or steal their way into it. There’s no
equivalent counterfeit of the Spirit. We either do what Christ requires, or we
don’t get it.
[iii]
D&C 121
2 comments:
Amazingly insightful and humbling, thank you.
You're welcome Scott! Thank you for reading!
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